Being a Hyung

It's been two weeks in Singapore and I've been figuring out more goals and my itinerary for the coming months. At the same time, I've been learning a little bit too.

Living with a family of three boys, aged 2, 4, and 12, I've been learning to be a mentor and a "hyung" ((형) Korean for big brother (masc.)) to 12 year old Shane. Being a hyung comes with many responsibilities - responsibilities different to those of being an "oppa" ((오빠) Korean for big brother (fem.)). As many of you would know, I have a younger sister, and if I have to say so myself, I think I'm a pretty good "oppa".

Being a "hyung", you have to be seen as cool, strong, wise and caring. You have a responsibility to be a role model to your "younger brother". In the Korean community, this applies to any younger kids that you may know.

The Famous Globe

Yesterday was Youth Day, and as I was bored and Shane had a day off school, I took him to Universal Studios on Sentosa Island. It was a beautiful day with the sun smiling down on us for the first time in the week and a half that I had been in Singapore.

Eww I can see up there...

We rode on the Transformer's ride first, and I was pretty surprised when Shane, sitting next to me, screamed. I didn't expect that. After all, I was never one to scream on a ride when I was his age. Next we went to the Mummy ride. It was something that I really wanted to go on, but Shane really didn't. We rode it - Shane covering his eyes and ears and still screaming.

I feel like he didn't want to disappoint me by bailing on a ride, and I think it was also the case on the Battlestar Galactica rides: Human and Cylon. As we were queuing up, I could see that he was fidgety and scared, but he lined up anyway. As we approached the roller coaster carriage, he asked me to hold his hand because he was scared. I said no. I told him that he had to go through this and face his fears.

He fainted halfway through the ride.

The rest of the day was spent watching the various shows and attractions at Universal Studios and on the long ride home, I told him that it was okay that he was scared and it was okay that he fainted...

Shane in front of the Jurassic Park Gate

Being a hyung is difficult - as my buddy Shane understands - and it isn't always easy to be the cool, strong, wise guy all the time. There are always going to be times where you are uncool, weak and dumb. I told Shane that that's okay, because in the end, being a "hyung" is also about showing that you have weaknesses and that you are also a person that makes mistakes. It's about telling your "little brothers" to be secure in their insecurity. It's about giving them a gentle landing pad when they fall and make mistakes. And most of all, it's about accepting and loving unconditionally despite the flaws that we may find.

PS. Here are three photos from when I was with my mum and sister in Singapore, taken at the Gardens by the Bay around sunset

On the Skybridge with
Mum, Esther and Shane

Jumpshot!

Sunset behind Marina Bay Sands